As a new feature on this blog I will be talking about things I think should be my weekly resolutions. Like most of you out there, I never stick to the customary New Year’s resolutions I make under emotional duress so I thought breaking it up into manageable weekly bits should be more doable.
Anyone ever heard of the word etiquette? Well I think most of us have in the sense of the informal one we acquired through experience (I am yet to meet anybody in this Twitter age that has gone through formal etiquette training unless they were seeking employment as butlers). We learn that for example , it is rude to stare at a lactating mother breastfeeding her baby even though you might be gawking at her expensive-looking hairdo. Another would be that you are allowed a maximum of two puffs of smoke when a lit cigarette is being passed around amongst friends. And the third and most irritating of all is that you have to excuse yourself when you have certain company, to fart.
Most of us don’t do it so overtly as to excuse ourselves by actually saying you were going to let one out of the cage. A simple courtesy grin and a nod usually does it. I personally do this when around acquaintances and girlfriends but with long time friends we all just let it rip when the need arises.
This got me thinking about human suppression of the body’s natural processes and how this might actually be affecting our collective health as a society. I can say personally that this also translates to the actual suppression of our innermost feelings and thoughts.You only have to look at our Ghanaian model of student-teacher relationship to see what I am talking about. Teacher belches years of knowledge most of the time without wisdom out to student and student soaks it all up like a sponge. No questions asked. Teacher is God and Student is minion. It gets so bad that when we are -now older students- actually allowed by society to contribute in class discussions and call the Lecturer to order when he errs we are left clueless as to what we are to say or do. So we just find ourselves playing the role of juvenile hecklers instead of that of the serious, but relaxed and curious student.
It is however far fetched to claim that flatulence suppression is responsible for creating generations of hard-core followers and just a few leaders who challenge the status quo to make real changes happen. But I suspect it might be the seed that germinates into that thorny plant that is, Ghanaian apathy, lack of courage and acceptance of runty ambitions.
Meanwhile, my tiny squeaky-bum rebellion is well underway and I would entreat you to join me in my struggle, one fart at a time.
RESOLUTION 1 – Not holding back physically and metaphorically
RESOLUTION 2 – Cutting down on milk.